Home Spirit - All Posts How To Heal Traumatic Life Experiences

How To Heal Traumatic Life Experiences


This article is themed around healing trauma, but the healing techniques can be applied to other areas of healing as well, so use them whenever you feel intuitively guided to do so.

Trauma can be experienced in many ways. These experiences can affect us so deeply that they can be staples of our identities. I see people all the time say “I’m a victim of rape, I’m a victim of sexual abuse, I’m a victim of being in a narcissistic relationship.” Immediately identifying themselves as a victim. For myself I didn’t say “I’m a victim” in those exact words, but I was as deep as I could have been in victim mentality/consciousness and I would say it in other words. How do you heal something that has been apart of you for so long? My intent with this article is that it helps to answer the question.

Intention & Confronting 

I have found the most important aspect of healing anything is the intention to heal it. Then we have to summon and find that courage within us to confront what we have been avoiding head on. The hows and the methods aren’t nearly as important.

All Is Provided That You Need

You either already have all the tools and knowledge you need to heal these traumas and experiences or they will be provided to you. This article can be an example of tools and information being presented to you as it’s time for you to heal these. If you were suddenly shipwrecked on a deserted island today and were the only survivor, with no contact ever again with the rest of the world… you would still be provided with all you need to heal and ascend.

Excuses, Justifications, & Avoidance

When we do get to the point that we are ready to heal our ego fights to hold on with everything it has. It makes excuses and justifications to do anything it can to avoid confronting the real issues, the illusions, and change our perceptions so that we can see these experiences from different viewpoints that allow us to move forward.

This is one of the biggest things to be aware of in yourself. The awareness alone can help you shift out of this to start confronting what you have been avoiding. Some of you that are reading this have been aware of the traumas in your life, for a long time. You’ve received many nudges and guidance that it is time to deal with this, to heal, and move on. But there are parts of you that are afraid and have done everything in their power to continue to avoid.

Some examples of this might be: “I will heal this when I get to this certain place.” “I will wait until this and this happens and this condition is met, then I will be ready to confront and heal this.” If you are constantly postponing what you already know you need to confront and continue to make up conditions that must be met as a prerequisite in order to “be ready” then hopefully this can help you come to a different realization. Placing conditions/prerequisites is something that extends outside of healing and trauma too. I’ve done this in many areas of my life and even now am releasing and shifting out of this for a few things.

Some of this may sound like I’m judging, but I’m not. I’m well aware of this because I was the same way throughout most of my life. I could make a justification and excuse to make it ok for me to keep drinking, to keep doing drugs, to keep being a victim, to avoid just about anything. And even when I would notice these thoughts I would convince myself no this isn’t a justification… then I would add another more intricate justification on top of that until I tricked myself.

You may be thinking that “Well my trauma is specific.” “There’s no one or very few that can understand my trauma” Which are still excuses and justifications. Trauma is trauma, your trauma isn’t any better or worse than anyone else’s trauma. We experience the traumas we do because that is what we chose/needed to experience. Someone living in a mansion having everything they could ever imagine could experience the same level of trauma or despair as someone starving to death and dying on the streets. When you try to compare and put your trauma on a pedestal, thinking it’s somehow more important or unique than someone else’s trauma then this is simply another illusion you have created for yourself to continue to avoid confronting it. I don’t know any grown up person that hasn’t experienced trauma at some point in their lives.

Healing Through It Yourself vs. Getting Help 

I have been fortunate enough to receive a great deal of help along my healing journey, but I still did what I needed to do myself. The signs of whether or not to do it yourself or to ask for help should be there for you. The easiest way to is to see how things are flowing. If you are meant to get help from someone else then that help should be easily accessible, often times just popping up and flowing. There are times that we have to summon the courage within ourselves to ask for help, which for some of us, is one of the hardest things we have to do. And if we do that and then something happens where we feel neglected and turned down by the help, then this can hurt a lot, and we end up using this as another excuse not to ask for help again or to once again avoid the issue. It was something I experienced right after my powerful awakening experience in Dec 2016 and have experienced at least a couple more times since then in some way or another. Now if I ask for help and am turned down, then I know it’s for a reason, usually meaning it would be better to ask a different person, go in a different direction, or I am meant to do it on my own.

As we go along in our healing journeys we end up learning how to be our own counselors,  healers, and cheerleaders. This becomes easier the more we do and as things progress. Often times it must be this way, for us to grow and truly heal.

Other times we do feel we need to reach out to others for help. I’ve done this plenty of times myself. A lot of the time I would reach out and get assistance as suggestions of things I could do or wait until after I did a lot of the work myself and was feeling stuck on the last parts. Other times it was more than that. I have been very skilled at making things much more complicated than they need to be! And gotten lost in mazes of my own stuff and felt I needed to ask someone else for help to see or get something I was having a difficult time with. I’ve found it has always been the most difficult to see or get information about myself as opposed to others, as the ego tends to get in the way a lot more for ourselves. It has been easier to completely put that aside when it is for someone else. This gets better with practice and awareness.

Higher Self & Spirit Guides 

When we do things by ourselves, we are never really alone. We have the help of our higher selves and spirit guides that often can play the roles of healers and counselors too. I will be sharing more that involves asking them for assistance through some of the methods in this article.

Ways To Feel Into & Release The Traumas 

When you have reached the point that you are ready to start confronting there are many ways you can tap into the traumas and express yourself.

Writing has been the most effective way for me. I think about the experience, close my eyes, meditate a bit into it and bring up the feelings around that. Then I write out the experience including the feelings I experienced at the time and what I am feeling now. I try to be as inclusive as possible and feel it while writing. When I’m finished that is often when I will ask my higher self and guides to help me transmute it. If I wrote it on the computer I will meditate and then tap into the energy I wrote and visualize the pages and words and feelings going into a big fire to be transmuted. I see it flow from within me, my fields, to outside of my auric field and into the fire that is a bit further away. Sometimes doing deep breathing and then breathing in the light and breathing out all that negative black old energy and having that go into the fire can help too. At the end of 2018 I wrote out a 100-120ish page autobiography of all the traumatic, hurtful, and shameful experiences in my life. Doing that was incredibly healing for me and my perceptions shifted even immediately after writing some sections, when I was able to realize what I was still holding onto. And many more shifts followed the completion of that.

Other ways I’ve played with that is to create a box or geometric shape. Then I visualize and put intent that it all flows into the box and ask my higher self and guides to transmute it, or I just visualize handing them the box and they can take it away and transmute it somewhere else.

The other visualization I like to use is using a vacuum. I generally create several of them with long hoses and then I have the vacuum suck up that old energy around my chakras and in my fields and all the hoses lead to a container. Then ask that my guides and higher self transmute it or take it away. Sometimes I’ll toss it into the sun and ask for it to be transmuted.

If writing isn’t your thing, then find another way that works best for you. You can try painting or drawing. Skill isn’t required at all. You could feel into the traumatic experience and bring those feelings to the surface then take some black and red paint and just throw it onto a canvas if that works for you. You could finger paint like a toddler and any other way. You can draw something out and even just label each thing if you can’t tell what it is by drawing. Using stick figures can be just as effective as drawing intricate and detailed characters. You can make a little comic strip of what happened with stick figures and speech bubbles.

Other ways to go about it is to get a voice recorder or a voice recorder app on your phone. Then record yourself talking about the traumatic experiences. You can do the same thing with video recording too if you wish.

You may find that the initial effort was enough and that it was healed and released. You may need to do more. You may not need to look back over the writing, painting, drawing or listen to the recording or watch the video. You may have to in order to complete it. By looking/watching/listening back over it you may very clearly realize the patterns and what was there and come to further realizations that help you release/heal.

If you need to take this even further, after you have expressed it you can sit in front of a mirror. If you wrote something, you can print it out and then look at yourself in the mirror and read out loud what you wrote to yourself. This could get very emotional and bring up a lot more to release and transmute. If you did a voice recording you can do the same thing and sit in front of the mirror and listen to the recording as you look into yourself. With a video I suppose that wouldn’t be needed as you are already looking at yourself in the video.

If you end up writing (in a notebook instead of on the computer), painting, drawing, or doing something that has a physical representation then you have another option too. You can build a real fire and then call in your higher self and guides and ask for assistance transmuting the rest of it. This can be a final step by taking what you have and throwing it into the fire and watching it burn.

Exercise, yoga, tai chi, qigong, and all sorts of methods like that can also be used. It’s more about setting your intention before doing and then while exercising or doing a session of one of those or something else you can be working through feeling it and releasing it as you go.

Some of the methods I shared above can also be done in meditation if you are great at visualization or in tune that way. You can even sit in meditation and visualize yourself writing and expressing that way. I would say it would be easier to do a physical representation in some way if you are able to. Because doing that helps me see/feel that it is flowing from within me out of me to be released.

Being Your Own Counselor In Meditation

You can be your own counselor. In meditation you can visualize an exact replica of yourself in front of you that will act as the counselor and you as the client. You can also visualize your higher self or a guide to be the counselor. Instead of an exact replica you can visualize whatever you are more comfortable with.

I think this can be very effective if you visualize yourself as identical. Because then you can share about the trauma and what you experienced to yourself. Then you can switch to be the counselor and ask yourself “If this wasn’t me and this was someone else, what advice would I give them? What would I say to them after they just shared this? And you may be very surprised at the wisdom and information you help yourself with! And even if that doesn’t feel right, you can just listen to yourself and let it flow as it is meant to.

Forgiveness & Gratitude 

When we assign blame to another we assign ourselves to be the victim. That is a post I’ve seen shared around on social media that I’ll never forget as it has rung a big bell inside of myself.

The trauma we experience often involves other people at various levels of involvement, unique to each, of what occurred. The others involved are often family, friends, but can be complete strangers too. We carry us as the victim and blame them and hold onto it. This can even lead to hatred towards them for what they did to us. We eventually get to the point we can forgive them, but sometimes that is done in steps opposed to  just one go.

I’ve found the most important aspect of forgiveness is to forgive ourselves. We often hold ourselves accountable for what happened. Saying we should have known better, we should have been smarter, we should have been stronger, we should have not been at that place at that day/time. The possibilities are endless with that. This also applies if you hold yourself accountable for something you did and feel like the perpetrator in the situation.

I’ve found that once I have been able to forgive myself, then it is easier to forgive the other person or persons involved. This can still take time and several attempts depending on what it was and how deep it goes.

So how do you forgive yourself? For myself it took a higher level of understanding and shifts in perception for the experiences before I was able to forgive myself. A lot of this understanding for me clicked in when I read the book The Ascension Papers by Zingdad. But I’m sure many other books and other material cover it as well. You can find that book for free on his website if you search for it online. In that book he specifically gave examples of sexual abuse he had been through and when his guide/higher self was explaining it, it was the explanation that he chose to have that experience. Often times these traumatic experiences we actually ask to have by souls that are extremely close to us, such as soul family or other beings we have incarnated with back and forth for a long time. And then there is often an exchange. “Hey you do this to me in this lifetime so I can have the experience, learn and grow from it, then I will do it to you in this other lifetime.” That’s just an example I suppose of how that exchange can go. On a soul level, this is a great gift to each other as we evolve as souls based on the many experiences we have. This is also how we get to learn who we are as souls, to see how the experience shapes us and how we react to it. Do we allow it to destroy us in this lifetime, get sick and die never having grown from it? Or do we let that experience fuel us to do our own healing and come out of it even stronger and more in our power than we ever thought possible? And just about anything in between. Either way there’s no judgement. If we are unable to deal with it in this life we can heal it in another lifetime. I know this all too well on the vast amount I’ve had to heal from other lifetimes that I wasn’t able to heal then and carried with me.

I struggled for a while to have that click in even after understanding it from that book. I would slip in and out of the victim consciousness and going back to not understanding it. As my experiences I was having did not match up with the beliefs/knowledge. How do we look at things we created and asked for when we were small children and didn’t know better? And couldn’t do anything to stop it? I eventually started to at least accept that yes I chose to incarnate to the family and people I did, knowing that many possibilities would happen from that choice to incarnate to them. So even if I wasn’t at the point of being able to accept that I manifested and chose everything that happened to me, I could at least accept on some level I chose it before I got here in some general way. Then from there it was able to click in further as I continued to raise my vibration and change my perceptions further of the events that transpired.

Once I was able to accept that there was an agreement on a soul level for that to happen and I chose it, that’s when the forgiveness part for others involved came in, at least started to. For the smaller stuff I was able to let those go pretty easily. For the stuff around one of my parents, it took many attempts as I went along before I finally got to the place of being able to forgive them completely.

You can tell when the forgiveness is complete because you then are grateful you had the experience. This may be very difficult to understand now if you are just getting into the trauma, but it’s the sign that you are complete with it when that time comes. When you can truly be thankful to the experience and the soul’s who were involved it is complete.

The forgiveness happens when you are ready for it to.

One method you can use is to write a letter or email to the people involved. You don’t actually send the letter/email, but you write it as if you were seriously going to. Don’t fake any of the letter, be authentic. If you are still pissed off and blame them, let that come out! The first letter may be every other sentence of cursing and saying “you fuckers did this to me and I hate you, you ruined my life” and whatever else needs to flow. On the other side of things if you felt you were the perpetrator in the event you can write the letter from that point of view, apologizing and letting flow whatever needs to.

If the first letter that flows out ends up being very negative, then wait and try to write it again the next day, week, or next month, or whenever you intuitively feel ready to. Maybe this time when you wrote the letter you only called them an asshole 4 times instead of 10 times, that’s progress!!! You can repeat this process of writing letters until you eventually are able to write something that is positive to the people and shows forgiveness and gratitude in it. Or at least to a point you feel you are happy with yourself and it is complete for you.

Figuring Out Where The Trauma Is Being Held 

This method you can do intuitively by feeling energy, but it will likely be much easier with a pendulum or using muscle testing. You can look up “self muscle testing techniques” on YouTube and you can buy a pendulum and look up “how to program a pendulum” or “how to start using a pendulum” on YouTube or online too. All you need your pendulum or muscle testing to do is confirm a yes or no answer.

If you can feel into it yourself then you can meditate and ask “Where is the trauma from this experience being held?” and then feel in your body where it is.

With a pendulum or muscle testing you can use process of elimination. You can ask “Is the trauma from this experience being held in one or more of my chakras? If yes then narrow down one at a time… Is it in my root chakra? Sacral Chakra? And so on.

Other questions can be: “Is the trauma in one of my organs?” If yes start asking one at a time which organs it is in. Is it in my spiritual body? Emotional Body? Mental Body? Auric field? Electromagnetic field?

Is it being held in my cells? In the cellular memory? Is it being held in the akashic records?

Most of the time it will be in one of those places. Some of those like the akashic records will be more complicated but I’ll share more information about that in the next section.

After you figure out where the trauma is being held you can then use the violet flame of transmutation energy (or whatever color/energy you feel to use.. If needed use the pendulum or muscle testing) to send it into that area. You can ask your higher self and healing team of the highest vibration to come in and assist you with healing it from that place. I have an article about the violet flame energy here: https://meashenu.com/using-violet-flame-magic/

You can delve a lot more into pendulum/dowsing and end up using techniques like spinning the pendulum counter clockwise to remove the trauma/energy then once confirmed it was removed you can then add healing energy back into that area by clockwise motion. You can also make pendulum charts/graphs so you could have all the chakras on one, all the organs on the other, or make a big chart with all of what I mentioned. That way it can be much faster by holding the pendulum over the chart and just asking where the trauma is being held and the pendulum will point right to it.

You may be able to clear the trauma with what I mentioned in this section, however, it may take a combination of several things I mention in this article overall to get it to complete. This one can be helpful to know where it is being held within you so you can feel into that location or field and bring it up to help with the overall healing process.

If you have tarot or oracle cards, depending on the deck you may be able to narrow more specifics to the healing that way too. Specifically some oracle decks that are based around healing themes would be beneficial. There are also color oracle card decks too, so you could get one of those and pick a card to know which color of energy you should use. But you can accomplish the same thing with a pendulum chart/dowsing/muscle testing too.

Akashic Records 

I’ve had some incredibly powerful shifts and healing take place from working in the akashic records. I have had someone assist me with this as I wasn’t able to see or get enough information myself at times, but I’ve also worked in my own akashic records successfully myself too.

If you are wanting to have someone assist you then you can ask around and search for an akashic record reader or someone that does akashic record healing sessions.

There are many websites, books, videos, and resources available for the akashic records. You can research more about what it is yourself as you may come to some valuable information, but I’ll also share a couple techniques and resources.

Linda Howe has several books out about how to read and heal through the akashic records. They contain all the information you would need to do it yourself, as that is the purpose of the books. There’s a certain prayer she shares that helps bring you into the records. In the healing through the records it also goes through great techniques that include forgiving yourself for the experiences, forgiving yourself for holding onto the illusions you have, and so on. I’ve had some great healing for myself come through that method that someone else was guiding me through from a session.

You can also look up Akashic records guided meditations and such on YouTube and try those out.

For the akashic records you are able to travel to the records dimensional space. There I often see it as a big library of sorts, but we all see it differently. If you go into that space there are beings there that can assist you and also your own personal guides that assist you with these things will be with you as well. If your intuition is strong and you have some of your abilities developed this can be done much easier if you go there, because you will be able to ask for help there and interpret what to do. Say that you are wanting help healing this specific trauma or issue from this life and to get assistance with it. Then go from there.

We also each carry our own copy of the akashic records, or akashic book. This we can access on our own anytime we wish to. Whenever I have done this I generally go within my heart space, my inner temple/world and then go into a library that is my own personal copies of all my existences. Then I would say what I was wanting to do and visualize a book flying off the shelf and appearing in front of me. Then visualize or put intent that the pages/experiences I was needing to heal, integrate, and so on be opened and I would put my hand on those pages to either send healing or to take in the integration. I would just use my intuition and pendulum to confirm as I went along until I got the final confirmation I was done with what I needed to do. Alternatively you can just visualize one single book that is your entire akashic book and then ask for the page/pages to show that you are wanting to work on, heal, or integrate. For life experiences that I needed to integrate to accept back some abilities from those lifetimes I would see myself putting my hand on each page.

That’s all I’ll share about the akashic records, as you will have to do some exploration on your own to use that method to heal from childhood traumas and other traumas.

Healing A Whole Time Period, Changing/Reprogramming Your Timeline

We have the ability to add/remove & reprogram our consciousness and our energetic makeup. If you try to just remove or delete trauma without having worked through it, it’s likely not going to work. It never did for me when I tried to avoid it that way haha. But this can be an extremely powerful method to use once you get to the point you are ready to do this. You will know when that is, or you can just do it and then do it again later if it wasn’t appropriate at this time.

For this I have always done it through a period of time. So for example from the time I was born until I was 7 years old. I think specifically I did it from when I was 3 years old to 7 years old as that was when the traumatic experiences severely impacted me and the course of my life to follow. You can do this in whatever time span you wish, even if it’s just a day though.

But the process is that you visualize a flat line and then designate a section of it the time period you have chosen. The entire line can represent the timeline of your current life/existence. Once you have chosen that section of time, you can remove it and hand that over to your higher self or guides or whatever method you want to use. Then you can place a new section into that line that represents love, compassion, wisdom, grace, and whatever other words come to you. So you are essentially taking out the despair, victim, trauma, powerless, helplessness feelings from that period and replacing them with all positive feelings and energy. Once you add in the positive section you can let that integrate into the whole line. Changing the past will change your present and there will be a shift from this, whether it’s significant and you can feel it right away or much more subtle later on.

There’s a manifestation technique that Neville Goddard shares that would be in the same category as this as well. His technique is called the revision technique. He recommends you do this often, where you revise each day how you wish it would have gone and feel that it really did happen that way. So if you got into an argument with a coworker. You could revise the day and that experience to see/feel yourself in the first person where that interaction was super positive and you both are happy. Then the next day, if this was successful, it will be like the argument never took place to begin with and everything is good to go. Some of his techniques can often be associated with changing the reality or switching to another alternate reality where things are different than the experience you originally had. But we are all so powerful as creators this is within our wheelhouse of abilities, all of us can do this.

But as far as trauma goes from childhood and other experiences, I’ve also used that technique and played with it. I would go back and revise that whole period or experience to change it to be how I would have liked it go instead. This essentially does the same thing, where you are reprogramming the past to change your present. To me this has resonated more as a final step in the process of healing traumatic experiences.


I have only shared some techniques, there are an infinite number of ways to go about healing and working through your journey. For me that has been some of the fun, using my imagination and coming up with my own ways to do things. Like I’ve mentioned, the most important thing is your intention to heal and standing in front of it and facing it. I don’t feel there is a wrong way you could go about it as long as you do that, regardless of what happens it will be for your highest good in one way or another.

So remember that, that you are free to use these methods and share, but you may want to explore others or create your own. Always trust your own intuition above all else. But there is a difference between intuition and your ego/fears working to avoid what you need to. Being able to recognize this will help a lot.






Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here